It's that time of year again.

And no, I'm not talking about taxes. It's Lent, a season for all Christians to step away from the normalcy’s of life and make the spiritual pilgrimage to the cross, as Jesus did for us so many years ago. Many people know it as that time of year when Christians have to "give up" something that is important to them, whether it's candy, alcohol, or for me... swearing. Pathetic I know, but I'm not really giving it up because it means a lot to me. I'm giving it up because not swearing means even more to me. I know that I shouldn't curse especially when it involves using the Lord's name in vain. I think it's vulgar, crude, and certainly conduct unbecoming of a lady (but no one ever accused me of being one of those so maybe I'm safe. Just kidding.) But I do it nonetheless and this is the year that I've decided it should stop.

Along with the sacrifices that we make (because that's really what giving something up is really about), we also chose to abstain from eating meat on Fridays, as well as to "fast" on Ash Wednesday and Good Friday. Fasting in layman's terms is depriving your body of food by eating only one full meal during the day. So why do we practice fasting and abstinence? If you asked my husband, he'd say that Jesus doesn't want us to eat meat because he's worried about our cholesterol! (He's joking, of course!)

Some say that the act of fasting and abstinence is a superficial offering and is deeply rooted in paganism and make such strong statements as, "God hates all pagan observances." All I can say to that is "Wow, that's pretty harsh and unforgiving... and very unchristian." Others say that it is to gain self-control, a simplification of life-style, a solidarity with the poor and hungry, and to return to Paradise. The 1983 Code of Canon Law specifies it as a way of turning from sin and serves as a form of penance. I think that no matter what it is that a person does, if the intent is to improve themselves and to be a better Christian, well that's okay with me.

Along those lines, I've also chosen something else to improve in my life. While it may seem small at first glance, I think the end result will hopefully lead to a major attitude change. Abstinence is something that Brian has struggled with in past Lenten seasons. It's not that he doesn't want to abstain, it's that he just forgets to abstain. I would always say, (after the day was done of course), "You didn't eat meat today, did you?" And the answer was most typically, "Yeah I did. Can't you just remind me next time?" Now, the fast and easy answers were usually, "I'm not your mother" or "I don't need you to remind me so why should I have to remind you?" Anyone in a committed relationship knows that those two phrases can pop up in a whole lot more situations than just Lent. But, are those answers, as accurate as they may be, the right answer for a healthy relationship? Sure it was unfair to somehow blame me for his carnivorous munching but how I chose to respond certainly wasn't fair either. So this year I'm taking a new approach to the situation. I'm choosing to be supportive of Brian's abstinence. Instead of harping on his failure, I'm going to help him by reminding him, as many times as necessary, that he's not suppose to eat meat. And even if he still forgets, well then better luck next Friday. The attitude to be learned, hopefully, is that it's not my place to judge Brian for his faults, but more importantly to recognize that he too is trying to be a better person and maybe it’s my job to help him carry his cross along the way.

As I’ve said, I believe that observing Lent is a way for me to focus on improving myself and hopefully lessening the amount of sin in my life. I know that Jesus made the ultimate sacrifice for us by dying on the cross so that we could be saved from our sins, and with that in mind, I think it's probably safe to say that my sacrifices pale in comparison.

The act of turning from sin should be something I focus on all year long, and not just during Lent, but as I've said before, I'm not perfect but at least I'm trying.